~flows into ur mind~

dear anamia

"Don't give up what you want most for what you want at the moment."

.hate/love this.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

never good enough

ya, i love this song. i am proud of me.
i believe, i shud not listen 2 others.i shud listen 2 me.

while writing this, i am eating vegie..
just small amount..
due to my headache..
n ive got test at class today, n yay, i can't answer it.

damn shit.

but on da bright side,
im starting my restrict last week..
em, restrict almost to fasting..
n last thursday, ive got huge headache, throw up a lot of liquid.

yup, my housemates once again making dat as A BIG DEAL that i must face..
they keep asking about my eating..
lately they ask ALOT..
they try to control me..
but sory, i want to have a perfect body, so here im da one who's having control..

its become easier since my roomate had moved out..

i can lock myself in the room, exercise and faking eat anytime i want..

n the great is, still rmber dat when i get back here, i gained weight..
its 54kg actually..
now due to the restrict, im back to 51kg..
im loving this.i can feel my collarbone. now waiting for my hipbone 2 appear. friends, who i loved, i need u..
please add me at ur twitter, so we can keep in touch..
n to anyone who's got any idea about supplements,protein shake or energy drink,
please let me know!

cos im searching for it now..

n 2 ana buddies, love ya.keep strong.

we may not be gud enough, but we are thinning 2 perfection.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

here we go again

i dun wanna regret cos i know dat world mean useless
sorry, for all dis time long dat i haven't write..

after da last post, all da struggling with final xam.

i went back home to far far away land..

n fullstop.we all know wat happened when it got to do with family.

when im not eating, mummy urge me 2..
cos when i got back, she said i looked skinny..

but now, ****, when i got back here, ppl said i look chubby..

yeah, for about 2 months, i gained mybe 2kgs??or 4kgs??

i really dun wanna c da number. cos it hurts me..

n here we start a new college life,
me n housemates..
then, im starting dis week..

im not sponsoring part of my money 2 da ous fund,
n i said i don wanna eat for dis week..
sudden, all my housmie bcame so damn bizzared bout dis..
y they have 2 care about it?? i know how 2 look after my own body..
i really dun get it..

just, im trying my best 2 get back 2 me..

n we'll see... that i am me..
i just missed u all ladies!!!

miss u very much...ana...