~flows into ur mind~

dear anamia

"Don't give up what you want most for what you want at the moment."

.hate/love this.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

gotta b somebody

trippin out, spinnin' around
i'm underground. i fell down
is dis real or is dis pretend??

who am i being now??
dis life is just full of fake..includ me..
a hepy-go-lucky gurl on da outside..

i moved 2 overc..stdying medic field..
never been easy, since i came, life is full of problems..
we're here need 2 live on our own feet..far awy, all about our future...

just few sec ago, found a blog of dis gurl..like me..
stdy n life, teenage..n found some habit dat can heal dis misery...
then i found another blog, then another few blogs..seems dat im not alone..
many ppl are just into our group...
dun wanna admit it, wanna hide it...
but feels glad n ok after did it...right???

im new..totally new....
ppl kept saying im thin..but i dun see it so..
i know...
after being struggled with all dis problems here,
saw lots of photos during my pre-found years,
im like..dun have words 2 describe it..
im gettin fatter..can see n feel ol da fats inside me..
binge?purge?? its been a long time...
im not really active into it..
starve 4 hunger?? if i wanna do it, i'll really do it...
but im not...
i dunno, im just confuse...
i felt so damn guilty when i ate lots of food..
n bcos of all da probs surrounds me n my frens makes me feels like ****
i ate 2 much, n now is winter break,
i gain 2kg...
feels so damn fat..
what should i do frens??
i know u're there frens, help me...
should i choose?? ana or mia?
mybe im weird but dats wat i wanna b...can i?

-ive already have a blog, but dis one is only 4 ppl who r like me-


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